LIFE HAPPENS

 Life happens. I believe that is the most truthful reason why I stopped blogging. As I gave birth to my daughter in December 2019, I had a list of what we wanted to do because we were so excited to spend every precious moment with her but then COVID-19 happened and we all stuck at home. And then the realities of life struck us. The pandemic stabbed all of us, backing up all of our plans and to just make the most of what we had to provide for our family which was very difficult because living in the province meant there was a limited opportunity for another income. Three months after I gave birth, I found out I was pregnant. at this point, our life is overwhelming, with the new baby, struggles with our finances and income, and then my pregnancy. I literally stopped writing even in my journal. fast forward after giving birth, we decided to sell in the market, but after a few months, we stopped because of the losses. I got pregnant again which is for me my most difficult pregnancy both physically and emotionally. before giving birth my father died it was devastating but life still goes on no matter how broken we are because we have children to look after. Now that my youngest is one year old, I want to get back on track with my writing and everything else that I love to do. I only hope that it is still not too late to start over.

PCOS journey

My PCOS journey started back in 2016, Four months after we got married. My husband and I got married in the month of April, then he got back to Saudi in July of 2016. My menstruation period is already delayed by the time he flew so our hopes are high that I'm pregnant. another month has passed and still no sign of pregnancy and the pregnancy test result is negative. My mother is so worried that she booked me an appointment with an ob gyne doctor. The doctor wants me to have a transvaginal ultrasound to see what's going on. So I did what she told me and we found out that I have a polycystic ovarian syndrome I was so shocked because all along I thought that if my period is regular then that means I have a healthy reproductive system guess I was wrong. The doctor gave me a birth control pill so that we could cure the PCOS for six months. at home, I searched what is PCOS and it's cause:

Polycystic ovary syndrome (PCOS) is a hormonal disorder common among women of reproductive age. Women with PCOS may have infrequent or prolonged menstrual periods or excess male hormone (androgen) levels. The ovaries may develop numerous small collections of fluid (follicles) and fail to regularly release eggs.

The exact cause of PCOS is unknown. Early diagnosis and treatment along with weight loss may reduce the risk of long-term complications such as type 2 diabetes and heart disease. (https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/pcos/symptoms-causes/syc-20353439)

after reading a few articles about it I became more depressed thinking that there is no cure and I won't be able to have my own baby. I was so sad so was my mother so we decided to have a second opinion and believe me it's worse than the first because the doctor said that she can't do anything about it and I might undergo other ways to have a baby that would cost me hundreds of thousands at that time I cried thinking that there is no hope.

My husband and I discussed my condition and I feel blessed because he always lift my spirit and he keeps saying that no matter what happens he will still love me. He never loses hope we always pray to God. 

In 2018, I decided to have another check-up to see if I still have a PCOS and unfortunately I still do. But the silver lining on it is that I met a couple who also have a PCOS on her left and right ovaries and got pregnant. they said that their baby is 8 years in the making and I was shook.  I told her my condition and she recommends her doctor that specializes in infertility. I was so happy it's like God is giving us hope especially because my husband decided to rest for a year or two so we can increase our chance of getting pregnant. 

October of 2018 as soon as he arrived we booked an appointment with the doctor and she is so nice to explain everything about my condition and what should we do to increase our chance. we did a series of tests like ultrasound and blood testing. it is expensive, I'm not gonna lie but we believe that it will be worth it. She wants me to lose weight and change my eating habits while taking birth control pills and my vitamins. Even my husband does all the necessary tests needed to make sure that he is also healthy and she advised him to take vitamins too.

it has been a long three months for us as we prepare ourselves because the doctor wants to start the process by January.

By January, We keep a positive spirit as we start calculating my menstruation cycle to know my fertile window. We are so lucky to have a very nice doctor like DRA. DIANALYN SAZON-CARLOS because she is so positive and informative. the process is that we will have an ultrasound on the second day of my period and I will be back by 7-10 days to see my eggs then she will inject me (forgot the name of the medicine) that will help on rupturing the eggs and then after 36 hours my husband and I must have a contact. We even have a scheduled sexy time. This what happens for four months.

End of April I am not expecting anything except my period then I got busy with my husband's birthday that I forgot everything then by the end of the first week of May I noticed that I'm delayed for one week. I told my husband about it and he got excited because ever since we started this process I never got a delayed period. I remember that day is Saturday and I decided to have a pregnancy test and the second line is blurred I ask for my sister's opinion and she said that her first try is like that the second line is blurred and advise me to wait for another week to try. but my husband is so eager to know the result so the next day he wants to go out early to buy a pregnancy test for me before going to church. that's when he said "totoo na yan mas malinaw na yung pangalawang guhit". We go to the church that day with a thankful heart because God indeed answered our prayer.

Now I'm on my 33 weeks and soon we will be able to see our princess. looking back at all the trials we faced I can't help but be thankful. With all this process I realized that God made our faith stronger.

To everyone who has a PCOS don't lose hope, always pray and be positive. have a healthy lifestyle and at the right time your blessing will be coming.

What is a true leadership looks like

As my #RoadToVA continues, I experienced a very disappointing situation that makes me ask what true leadership is.

What happen is that I applied to a company where I will be trained first as an Online Consultant. In the training I met a fellow Filipina who is also determined to pass the training and start working with them. At first, the Trainor/Manager is really nice and informative about the company and our job but afterwards she didn't really trained us instead she just gave us material to read which is long and totally out of our league since it's all about plastic surgery. So she gave us the material that we need to study (memorize) for three hours and that is 5 topics with no explanation of the procedure. So we study and watch the procedure as we also searching for the words that we don't know. After 3 hours, She will call us and the exam happens which is we will be typing the information in detailed which doesn't makes sense to us because the way we understand it we have time to write down the details so we don't need to memorize it. I let it pass thinking that this is just a challenge for us and I'am willing to pass it so I study so hard for the next days until one day in our exam I made one mistake and she is so disappointed that she made me look like I'am not taking it seriously (what happens to all the right thing I did in the previous days?) one mistake and she seems like she wanted to fire me. So, for the next couple of days while taking a rest from studying, A question keeps bugging me. Is this the type of boss that I want? and a clear no is my answer. So I decided to quit even though I want the job.

For me, A good leader/boss is a vital part in making an employee stay in the job. A leader that will lift you to make you grow in your career and to do your job well.

#RoadToVA

VIRTUAL ASSISTANT

What is Virtual Assistant? I came across this a few years ago when I'am looking for a home-based job and it really catch my attention. I feel like I can do it but I lack the skill that they're looking for so I end up not getting in when I applied. This year I've been so serious into really having a job at home so I end up applying non-stop everyday and with God's grace I came across with the virtual assistant course in Facebook. I enrolled in it (that's how serious I'am in getting a work as a virtual assistant) I will start on May 5 but as early as second week of April I've been doing some readings about it I also watch YouTube videos about it. It's basically an administrative support virtually and I think the skill that I lack is the marketing side of it since mostly of the client requires a VA to post a content to market something and creativity like editing a photo or a video. I really want to blog everything about my journey to being a virtual assistant so I will keep you guys posted about it. I pray that I will learn everything I need to achieve my goal.

Parents Birthday

My husband's parents' birthday is right around summer time (March 9 and 10) so we take this opportunity to go out of town and spend our annual summer bonding. mind you, it's not easy to organize this out of town with 13 families in the family. 13 because all of my husbands sibling is 12 plus him that's equal to 13. If you will include their partners that's 26 plus the parents 28 so there are 28 adults already. the grandchildren? I have no idea how many are they but the last time they count it there are 30 plus. So imagine organizing an out of town trip with a big family. Anyway good thing my sisters started planning it as early as December. They decided to go to Zambales this year.

The resort we chose is called Jash Resort. It is good for budget travellers like us we got the big cottage worth 7000 pesos with 3 free tents. it is near in the ocean which we like. The lady in the resort is very accommodating as well as the other staff but the minus point is that the fee for cooking is too much it costs 1000 pesos. What I also like about the resort is that there are stores inside so if you run out paper plates and plastic spoon and forks you can buy them there.

Here are some of our picture:

MY ROUTINE

it's a new day today!

another day to conquer, another day for a fresh start.

Everyday when I wake up I always look at my planner so I could see what task am I doing today. And sometimes I write first what needs to be done and then throughout the day when I finish a task I use a marker to highlight it.

if my morning is not busy I usually do my devotion. but most of the time I do this in the afternoon because I have a lot of spare time in the afternoon. but I plan on switching it in the morning because I feel more energized throughout the day if I start my devotion in the morning.

in the afternoon, I usually read a book about improving myself. I don't know why but this kind of book always catch my attention but this particular book changed my life (I will have a separate blog about it.) I end up doing the steps in this book.

this three routine will never be out of my routine because they are very important for me. I'am a housewife so I have a lot of household task that I need to finish everyday as I refuse to hire a house helper, but so far this routine works for me as it fuels my spirit and my mind of a positive aura.

HOW DO YOU SPEAK TO YOURSELF?

How do you speak to yourself? Honestly, people will thought that I am insane if I ask them this question, but if you will realize its importance I bet you will be speaking with yourself a lot.

Speaking with yourseld doesn't mean that you must be in front of the mirror, talking out loud, now that is really insane. What I meant was how will you tell yourself to handle something that is a better version of you. Example you have a lot of work to do, so instead of using "I should" you can use "I want" by doing this you will notice a change in your spirit you will not feel obligated instead you will feel enthusiasm to finish it.

I learn this in reading the book REINVENTING YOURSELF by Steve Chandler. This book is really helpful because at every point in our lives we can always reinvent something for ourselves for the better. He has a ways on how we can be an "owner" instead of a "victim". It will take a lot of time and practice in doing his steps but I believe that it will be worth it because I already started doing it to myself. That is why I recommend this book to everyone who wish to be the person they've always wanted to be.